WWMD - What Would Mom Do?

Here is my challenge to other bloggers, in honor of Mother's Day, I challenge you to write a piece about what you mother has taught you and then pass the torch on to all of your blogging and non blogging friends.

My mother passed away a few years ago from brain cancer.  I wish I'd taken the time to sit with her and ask her questions about life, about who I am, and about my family.  There are so many moments in my life where I question my sanity and wish I could just pick up the phone and make that phone call, hearing, "Don't worry.  It's not you.  Boy when you were little you did the same thing."  But instead I focus on those things that I feel she ingrained in me, made sure since she wasn't here a long period of time that I focus on the important things.

There is nothing you cannot do.  Sure Mom was always pushing us, but it was because she wanted more for us, she us to move beyond the street we grew up on, she wanted us to live.  She showed us that she could do the same thing is walking into a new job, a new life and persevering because to her, failure was not an option.  Try bringing home a bad grade in math in elementary school, she taught us early that she expected more from us and wasn't taking no for an answer.  Later in her chemotherapy time she still didn't give up, she decided that sure things may look like shit at the moment, but just being here was worth it.

I'll never forget watching her on that hospital bed playing Uno with my oldest son, listening to him complain that he was losing to her every time because they were "princess cards."  He didn't notice that her head was shaved, that there were tubes coming out of her, he noticed the princess cards because she didn't draw that attention, she simply went on with life.

I love that in her diagnosis we had the gift of time.  We were able to tell her how we felt in those months, talk about different feelings, and most of all hug her.  We didn't mind pushing her around on the red rocker (combination walker wheel chair) we just knew that every moment, every memory we created were special because unlike others out there, Mom had an expiration date.  There was a journey waiting for her that few even knew existed until they were stepping off that ledge.

Have some fun.  Sure, our dogs never sat or heeled or pooped in our yard.  We had hamsters that ran along the top of the kitchen cabinets.  We had birds that flew around the house landing on the dinner table picking the seeds out of the tomatoes.  Our house was never spotless, there was always time to play mermaid on the blue carpet in the basement rather than scrubbing toilets.  Later I remember her running after Wolfgang who was 3 at the time with a Ninja Turtle mask while I tried to get used to another newborn.  She always had time to have fun with her grandkids, a trait I hope to pass on.  We played hard then we cleaned up - it was simple.  Dishes after Thanksgiving, wrapping paper after a birthday, dog poop after a new puppy.  I love how I told her after a few beers to look "casual" going into the hotel to use the bathroom.  Well, she tripped into the hotel lobby, and tripped going back out to the street - both of us laughing.

Don't give up.  Many can decide to live in the life they have.  My mother decided that there was something out there for her and she went for it.  She wasn't looking for romance, she was looking for a partner and she found one.  Someone who sat with her every night drinking a beer talking about their day, someone who enjoyed making homemade soup as much as she did, someone who pushed her in the wheelchair during those years, gently touching her bald head before lightly kissing it.  Someone who took care of her and loved her until the end, loved her so much that he passed of a broken heart 6 weeks later.  Most are not that lucky.

When it is time, it is time.  My mother fought the good battle against a disease that slowly takes the pieces of the person you love and steals them away.  We took her advice when we had to make the hard decisions in her treatment, when we had to bond together and say goodbye.  We knew that she lived life to the fullest and the present condition was not acceptable, we knew that from years of listening to her tell us what she wanted us to do, she was silently telling us it was time.  There was a new adventure awaiting,  time to let her go.  The nurse told us, "She had a strong heart," when she died, we all knew that was true.

I know that we did the right thing, because when I want to call her and ask those questions, I feel a sense of peace.  Leave the dead be, they are in their own place, your job is to live now, is what she always told me.

Oh, and the secret to a clean house?

Lower the shades, they'll never see the dust.

Happy Mother's Day Shot@Life!

This Post was written for the Shot@Life Mother's Day Meme with Sisters From Another Mister.  I am honored to be one of the 20 bloggers writing posts about Mother's Day.  I really tried to get all mushy and say sweet things about being a mother - but then I realized that I need to be myself.  My post is about those tale tell signs you are a mother.

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I have made my donation to this great cause because as a mother, I know we want the best for our children and mothers shouldn't have to choose between vaccinating a children and keeping food on the table.  A simple $20 donation can immunize a child for their lifetime!  So if you like this post, share it on Facebook and Twitter and let's start spreading the word!

Want to donate?  See below!

A mother (or mum/mom) is a woman who has raised a child, given birth to a child, and/or supplied the ovum that united with a sperm which grew into a child.  

How do you know you are a Mother?

Grey hair - remember that full head of beautiful hair until - them.  Now most of the hair has either been pulled out (in the beginning by a toddler, later by you) and colored out of a box.

Loss of Hearing - being selective or the constant din of life at home, most Moms are heard saying, "What?"

Nose Protrusion - Do not mess with a Mom on a scent mission - let her move through the house unhindered as she searches out the culprit for "that smell."  And even if you don't smell it, agree with her because when she finds it under your bed, the "I told you so," doesn't last that long.

The slight limp in your walk.  It starts with holding a child in your arms for the first year of their life.  I never realized love handles were actually handles for children to hold onto.  The limp is from favoring one hip for a child permanently bowing one leg.

One arm longer than the other - this is due to spending a lifetime picking up stuff from the floor.

Indentation on your foot - this permanent mark on the bottom of your foot is caused from stepping on something left from a child - a lego, a Barbie Doll shoe, a marble.

Movement - moms are that person standing in the grocery line rocking back and forth.  No, we do not have a child in our arms, but we still rock back and forth - it is a habit we will take with us for the rest of our lifetime..

As a mother, I have each and every one of these traits and I walk proudly with them.  Only other Moms know the hard work and determination that goes into shaping and molding that little ovum that united with sperm into a functioning adult.  We also know that we are not perfect, because being perfect means we are doing something wrong.  Happy Mother's Day to me, I'm going to do what I desire to do on that day - sitting on the couch watching my Duck Dynasty 
marathon while my children work on adding a few notches to their character.

Take that you therapist in the future.

Here is how you can make a difference
Find out more about Shot@Life

Visit Sisters From Another Mister and make your donation now.

The Mothers day meme runs  May 8th and run until the 18th.

We invite you to become part of it.  Write your post about your mother, being a mother or simply Mother's Day. Make a donation of a minimum of $10 linking up your post, (better yet, $20 can immunize a child FOR LIFE)

This is two simple cups of coffee and you've helped a child!

Of course, all donations are tax deductible.

And the Bonus for this meme is that every post and comment will give you an entry into some fun giveaways!

Team ImmUNITY Nicole Morgan – shot@life

A REAL Mother's Day...

Broke?  Have money but not sure what to buy?  Here's some great free ideas for Mother's Day.

1.  Breakfast in Bed - one year my boys gave me a Miller Lite and a piece of burnt toast for Mother's Day.  Let's be honest, wouldn't you like that better than burnt eggs and weak coffee?

2.  That someone in my home would look at me and say, "Yes, I hear you."

3.  That same someone or maybe someone else will say, "You know what?  You are right.  Stabbing myself in the eye, sniffing the pepper, riding my bike off the pier, eating a whole bottle of Texas Pete was not a good idea.  I'm going to listen to you!"

4.  All the towels on the floor will mysteriously disappear and reappear folded neatly on the towel rack.

5.  I'll go through the morning routine, then stop suddenly and think, "Hey, there wasn't dog poop on the steps.  Did SOMEONE pick it up?"

6.  That I will see the bottom of the coffee cup before it turns cold.

7.  An entire shower of hot water.

8.  That I do not have to hear, "STOP!"  For just one day.....I'm begging.

9.  That there will not be greek tragedy at the dinner table.  You will eat it, you will not complain about it, AND you will like it.

10.  That everyone will come running into the room, sit next to me on the couch and say, "Wow Titannic, that's one of my FAVORITE movies."

We need these holidays!!!

Special holidays that we like to celebrate:

Mother's Day Period - this once a month holiday starts with the Feast of Chocolate and ends with the Pouring of the Wine.  It is marked with the wearing of the Spankx during the parade of complaining.

Feast of the Go to Your Room - this holiday happens the second day of Spring Break.  Included with this holiday is the Go to Bed Without Dinner Fast and some countries handcuff or tie brothers together in celebration.


National Science Fair Marathon - this is a Spring holiday.  Starting on a Sunday night and running through 6am Wednesday morning.  The start of the holiday is when the the child remembers 8pm Sunday night that their Science Fair project is due the next morning.  Parent and child go four days without sleep culminating with the feast of the Triptich involving glue, glitter and vodka.

SpringTime Slimfest Fast - this holiday period begins early May marked by the first bikini commercial.  Many women mark the fast with the purchase of Nair, prozac and Slimfast.  It has roots  back to ancient times, when the virgin with the most weight was thrown in the well to satisfy the Gods, making women lose weight prior to the holiday to save their lives.  Now, women lose weight not to save their lives but to save their waistline.  Or to not be mistaken for beached whales in bikinis when not observing the holiday..

Summer Break Holiday - this holiday runs from June through August.  Many local children rub their faces with as much sugar as possible and wear a dumb look on their face signally the atrophy of the brains from lack of use.  Computer manufacturers mark the holiday with several new downloadable games at three easy payments of 3.99 while most liquor stores see a run on tequila and limes rather than wine and vodka.

Eclipse of the Children's Room - this event happens when the floor of the children's room becomes completely obscured either by the passing of clothing from drawers to the floor, or the number of towels from the bathroom.  A total eclipse of the floor happens when the mother peeks into the room, then slowly shuts the bedroom door.

And finally,

Mother's Day - originally the shortest holiday of the year, commencing once a child is born then ending 5 minutes later when the cord is cut.  The holiday now is one day a year and consists of the burning of the toast, the coffee surprise and the bed marathon.  the secret behind a successful Mothers Day is the little known sub holiday called The Five Minuter, 5 minutes of time alone in the bathroom with the door locked!!