WTF - Tag You're It!

So I'm happily stalking all my friends on Facebook, when all of a sudden a red notification button appears.

"So and So has tagged you in a photo."

Oh.

No.

Immediately my mind goes back to what I did last night.

I was cool.  I think.  Nothing crazy.

Oh wait, I was dancing, wasn't I?

Immediately I go to the picture.  Hoping it was not from the night before because, and I have to pull all the cuss words out of what I was saying to myself, "I wasn't wearing the most flattering outfit benefitting a picture of tagment on the Book of Face."

My computer sensing my discomfort that there is some picture out there in the stratosphere of me that I cannot get to, immediately decides that my wireless router will not work when I am just pulling up the picture that has my name screaming all over the internet.

NOOOOOO!!

I have to go and reboot the router.  Wait the agonizing 15 seconds to replug it in, wondering if I should just jump on the hot spot of my phone because....

God, what is the picture and what I am doing???????

I am praying the it is some inspirational prayer about trees and nothing to worry about.  But only I know what I have been doing with my friends lately, and I cannot tell you how many of them have smart phones.

They mean well.

"Oh look, here's a picture of Kelly in the 176 pictures I uploaded from Alex's 2nd version of his 15th birthday party."

No one thinks before they tag, important things like:

Well, doesn't Kelly look like a fat cow in this one.
Oh look, Kelly's boobs are falling out of her shirt, is that a nipple I see?
Wait a minute, is that a donkey behind Kelly, who's tongue is, in the picture, in a very appropriate place.
Who is that girl standing inappropirately close to Kelly and why is she staring at her like that.

No, they go ahead and load a photo, tag me in it and don't think of the consequences.



Finally, the router comes back online, now I have to wait for the computer to catch up.  Facebook is like, "Oh I'm sorry, is this important to you?  Well, we've changed our algorhythms so that you cannot see it!"

I'm searching wondering if the one time my friend took her phone into the bathroom at that bar resulted in the photo, when the photo finally pops up.

Oh, wait.  Look it's one from when I am seventeen.

Dayum, I look pretty hot.

And skinny.

And when did I have those legs.

All that worry over nothing.  I guess I'll leave the tag.

Just as I sigh in relief, a second notification pops up on my screen.

Nicole Morgan has tagged you in a photo.

Oh shit, she lives in South Florida.

It could be a bathing suit photo.

Facebook says, "Oh, now is the perfect time to SLLLOOOOWWWW DDDOOOWWWNNN."

Is it just me....

Or do all these women with lots of plastic surgery just look freaky?  Have you seen Dolly Parton lately?

Or does elastic in the slimming jeans not slim, it just makes your butt look bigger when they fall down as you bend over.

Or do you look around when you are doing something wrong wondering if the paparazzi is going to take a picture of you?

Or do you say all kinds of cuss words in your mind, resisting the urge to say them out loud.  Sort of like, "Are you a f*cking idiot?"

Or do you think your kids are the smartest ones out there, and everyone else's are annoying?

^^^is true with your dog too?

Or does seam in your tights looks like a C-section scar when you take them off?

Or do you always feel like you are getting shafted with 100 calorie packs of ANYTHING.

Or do you spend way too much time trying to figure out if a picture is photoshopped, then smiling when you realize you are right?

Or do you sit through 30 minutes of a child's TV show before you realize that you are actually sitting alone?

Or does not a single gas station attendant can give out directions?

Or do you resist commenting or liking anything just posted to your page because then everyone would know you spend all your time on the Internet?

Or is a door never locked when you need it to be locked - bedroom, bathroom, you name it.

What are you quirky observations?