WTF - Keeping It Real and Keeping It Safe

Some mornings you just have to love your Facebook feed, two stories completely related right next to each other!



The First was this story about a woman asking firemen to remove a chastity belt.  Why am I talking about this story?  Here's some of the details:

One story said she was 60 years old and wore the belt to stay pure.  Honey, you are sixty, is staying pure so high on the list? Could leather and steel really be comfortable for that long?

Then it said, she walked into the station wearing the belt. With anything else?  What were the firemen thinking when she said, "I need help breaking the lock on my Chastity belt."

Why did she need help breaking the lock?  Well, she lost the key.  Wow, there are lyrics to a good Country Music song in there, but then think about it - she was sixty. I've been losing my phone since my early teens? A tiny Chastity belt key?

Of course I did search whether or not these things were still for real, and in case you need one, well, here ya go!  CLICK HERE.  I may be a little worried about the one review mentioning the key broke the first time they tried it in the lock. At least the fire station is only 5 minutes away.

Upon my search, chastity belts run from 6.59 to over 400 dollars. I can see a younger version of me, say, like 59 years old saying, "Honey, I'm sorry. I have a chastity belt on, but don't worry, I bought the cheap one only 6.59!"

Of course perhaps I could use the belt, "Honey, you said you would fix the drain on the sink in the bathroom, well, I lost my key down there."

***

Then I scroll down to the product I'll actually use.  This lock doesn't have a key, it has an APP!  Controlled by your phone, who needs keeping up with a key.

Who am I kidding, I think my chastity went by the way of the dinosaur legions ago.

Then I think, I really could use this product. 

Easy locking.
Controlled by a phone app so no lost keys, I only lose my phone occasionally
Keeps everything safe
Lifetime guarantee!!!

The App is designed for you to set a goal before you reward yourself, you could could set a goal of cleaning house for 1 hour, or maybe putting in 10,000 steps, or maybe finishing that book!

You know you want it too!  Click here for this amazing product!

Yes, the smart cookie jar!  Tuck away the cookies, the candy (Not the chastity belt candy) the TV remote, the KY, the gaming controller until you app tells you the coast is clear.

At least we don't have to get the fire department involved with this one.

Unless they have a sweet tooth like me.