And the winner is....Lesson Learned, I think...

There's nothing like the feeling of a Mom when you 8 year old tells you he's running for office, and it includes a campaign stop at Old Richmond complete with a speech.  Then the feeling when you watch you child do the thing that freaks you out - getting up and speaking in public.  Then he comes home after voting and says.....

"Eli won the election.  It's OK."

My first reaction?  "Damn that Eli, how did he win.  Didn't they see how perfect you were?'

Luckily this reaction is in my head and we do what we Melangs do best, we move to plan B.

"Are you OK?"

"Yep...pause...I can still serve dessert to the veterans."

Me, pause as I try to think of the perfect Mom moment, "Well, you did great.  I'm glad you ran."

I drive on and do a few things.  Marvel that my child has taken the loss so well, did I instill that in him? Of another momism, then I worry, Do I not make him competitive enough?  Maybe he's got my flexible gene, don't get what you want, move on.

Then I realize that he's taught me a lesson.  He went for it, when I would have been nervous.  He made the signs himself, promoting himself when sometimes I hide behind my flaws, he wrote his speech himself when I really wanted to help him, then he stood up and did what causes me to sweat - spoke to a full house.

Then he did what I am the most proud of, he took a hit and didn't let it bring him down.  He shrugged that off, figuring there's more opportunity out there, so why cry over what you lost, why not make a  move into something else you want.  Is he dwelling on what he could have done?  He's a kid.  He's already forgotten about it.

So my son taught me a lesson.  Don't worry about what other's think of you, do what you want to do.  And if it doesn't work out, then move on to Plan B and keep your positive attitude.  Sure, there was a few sniffs because he didn't win, but when I come out and see that little boy moving onto something else it's my kick in the butt to do the same too.

Maybe we are both growing up.  What do you think?

You know you're a writer when

You child asks for a story for their Halloween Party - and you surprisingly come up with one - complete with the names of everyone in the class!

Twas the school day before Halloween, 

And all through Mrs. Markland’s class,

All the kids were excited. fighting over the Hall Pass.

Their bookbags were hung filled with candy and stuff,

In hopes that soon they could eat enough.

The children were seated, bottoms in chairs, 

While visions of Trick or Treating made it hard to bear.

And Mrs, Markland trying to teach at the Smartboard

Had just settled when Jayden pulled the power cord.

When outside the door, there arose such a clatter.

Rebekah, Mike and Jaylin ran to see what was a matter.

Away to the door, Mackenzie and Kailynn ran in a flash,

Zakhia pulled open the door with a crash.

The trees of Old Richmond still had fall leaves,

The wind was blowing, making more fall from the trees.

When, what to Jaylin and Christopher’s wandering eyes pops,

But one BIG pumpkin, 20 maybe 30 pounds tops!

A funny pumpkin, full of seeds and fun,

Zander said it was Super Pumpkin, Tanner said no that’s not the one.

It rolled past the tree, and into the room,

Brandon jumped in the air as past him it zoomed!

The pumpkin rolled and laughed as it did,

Kaleb tried to grab it but past it he slid.

Cecelia said, “Stop let’s see what it does.”

The children stood still, their voices a buzz.

“My name is Jack,” the pumpkin said loud,

“I need your help,” he said to the crowd.

“What could he want,” Iselle whispered to Julia.

“Maybe he thinks we want pumpkin pie,” said Cynthia.

“Help me have some fun on Halloween.”

“I don’t want to dress up as a king or a queen.”

Jack the pumpkin rolled as he said, “I’m not a phantom.”

“I need your help to become a Jack O Lantern.

Max jumped up high, “We can help you with that.”

Dawson jumped with him, “Pumpkin Pie makes me fat.”

Mrs. Markland came with a knife and a scoop.

Emma cut open the top and pulled out some goop.

“Ewww, Yuck, Golly Gee.”

Max’s hand were full of pumpkin and slimy.

Julius gave him some eyes, Daylan carved out the nose.

Max wanted to give him pumpkin toes.

They decided on a happy pumpkin, with a big smile,

Cameron  said, “He’s got some pumpkin style.”

They carved and made a pumpkin to be proud,

And as the he rolled away he said to the crowd.

Thank you for making my halloween howl,

Off to Trick or Treaters I’ll prowl.

Thank you Old Richmond, I feel so dandy,

Happy Halloween to you, now go eat your candy.

Amazing myself....

What happened to me last night?  I felt the urge to cook....


So here's my masterpieces of the evening:

Kels Kickin It Potato Salad

Potatoes
Crisp Bacon
Onions
Hard Boiled eggs
Mayo
Montreal Steak Seasoning.

Cook the bacon and onion together while potatoes are boiling.  Toss everything together and serve warm.

Apples My Way

Chopped Apples
Brown Sugar
Butter
Pumpkin Pie Spice
Caramel sauce
Graham Crackers

Carmelize the butter with the brown sugar in a skillet, add the apples and spice and cook through.  Toss mixture with caramel and crumbled graham crackers.


Finally.....

Mellow Mushrooms

Mushrooms
Butter
Red Wine
Garlic

Saute the garlic and butter, add mushrooms and saute until half their size, add splash of red wine and cook off alcohol.

Enjoy these recipes - or enjoy all my leftovers, either way I amazed myself!

Isn't It Obvious? Stupid Questions

Sometimes I think brains are becoming a endangered part of our bodies.  Most are from my children, many are from people I know.  I answer politely but want to share what's running in my head.

I'm in the grocery store, I run into a friend and she says, "What are you doing here?"
What I say, "Just filling the fridge again."
What I want to say, "Putting on my running shoes and mall walking the isles of the grocery store, then grabbing a banana and acting like it's a phone."

I'm out on a run and my phone rings.  My friend says, "Are you running?"
What I say, "Yes, will be finishing up in about an hour."
What I want to say, "No, I'm practicing for my staring role in my next porn flick, hold on, there, that's better."

We're in the car on the way to school, my son says, "Where are we going?"
What I say, "Well I'll let you take a guess."
What I want to say, "Are you an idiot?"

I'm right in the middle of a particularly good dream with Johnny Depp and a hand taps my shoulder.  He says, "Are you sleeping?"
What I say, "No, what's wrong honey.
What I want to say, "Your interruption of my time with Johnny means that when I'm up at 5, I'm waking your butt at the butt crack of dawn!"

Standing in line at the convenience store, he looks at me and says, "Are you going to pay for that."
What I say, "Uh, yes I am."
What I want to say, "Catch me!"

Someone calls on the house phone and asks, "Are you home?"
What I say, "Uh, yes."
What I want to say, "Damn the secret service found me because of you!

Standing with a new Mom, she looks at me and says, "Don't they grow fast."
What I say, "Uh yes."
What I want to say, "She's only a month old.  Seriously?"

Standing in McDonalds and the person behind the counter says, "Can I take your order?"
What I say, "Yes, I'll have the large sugar free vanilla iced coffee..."
What I want to say, "No, I heard this is a great place to pick up guys."

So the next time you ask a question, think twice, if you see a strange look on my face, don't ask what I really want to say, you don't want to know.

What stupid questions do you bite your tongue on?

Woods of Terror - You want me to go first?

Recently I had the pleasure of going to Woods Of Terror on Church Street with my nephews.  I gave up horror movies a while ago, so knowing that I was walking into a horror movie style set, I made sure I was armed with two things, warm clothes as the park is outside and Depends because, well, you know, I am over 40.

We walk into the park, and the 14 year old and 21 year old are excited, I’m nervous because seriously, the last time I was in a haunted house it was when I was a teenager and they thought it was funny to throw spaghetti noodles on you saying it was intestines.

Woods of Terror was the real deal, for me it wasn’t the scariness of the movies, it was the more SURPRISE type scariness that I found to be a lot of fun.  Going through the door into the attraction, both boys pushed me to the front of the line with a feeble, “You can go first Aunt Kelly, you know, ladies first.”

What?  Me go first?  The first attraction involved pitch darkness and pushing through very tight spaces so I was glad that I went first, I could go as fast as I wanted to, rather than waiting for other scardey cats to get their courage and move forward.  My 14 year old nephew created grooves on my waist from holding tight, my 21 year old nephew protected me when someone jumped out from behind a corner.

Woods of Terror was the real deal, a lot of fun for someone who gave up horror movies a long time ago.  I enjoyed the surprise of the actors, and was very grateful that it wasn’t the demonic style creepiness.  I loved running through the corn until I hit the completely dark school bus knowing that something lurked in those seats and still surprised when it popped out.

My favorite part was the 3D portion of the attraction, the skulls on the wall felt like they were moving toward, the moving tunnel at the end had everyone laughing as they fell over trying to walk through it.  The work done on the park made each attraction look authentic, the long Freddy Kreuger claws on the entrance to a house was pretty cool.

We had zombies, vampires, movie stars (Michael Meyers, Jason, Freddy, etc) and all the actors stayed in characters and stayed away from us.  I like knowing that they cannot touch you because well, when you get older, your personal space is, well, personal.  The Virus Zombies were sniffing around us, the Vampire Gals wanted my nephew, the Pirates were pretty funny.

I would recommend Woods Of Terror for kids over 13, I think younger kids wouldn’t like the surprises though everyone would like the sets.  The zombie parade at the beginning gave me an idea of what to expect, I carefully avoided the one that pointed me out at the end of the parade when they were asked to “pick a victim.” 

This is a fun tradition to Halloween, grab a bunch of friends, strap on the Depends and go out and enjoy a good scare.  Don’t tell them I sent you because they scare you extra special as a thank you to Forsyth Family Magazine.

What’s your favorite holiday scare?

Halloween Checklist

Five Reasons I like Halloween…

1. Screaming is fun - you can do it without people looking strangely at you.
2. Cleaning your home is optional, dust is a given in any haunted home - simply say it’s part of the decorations.
3. Nothing better than watching an expression on someone’s face as they are scared.
4. Many of the Elvira’s out there should not be an Elvira, be happy you can pull off an Elvira.
5. I can be happily married, most single people are always killed first in a horror movie.

Questions to ask yourself for Halloween:

1. Why do women think it’s OK to dress slutty for Halloween?
2. Why do many Moms think it’s OK to dress their daughter’s slutty for Halloween?
3. Why do most of these women not have a reason to dress slutty for Halloween?
4. If the power went out and there was a noise in your basement, would you go?
5. Who gave you the right to give me something healthy when trick or treating at your door?
6. What part of your sick personality makes it fun to scare the shit out of little kids?
7. Why does holding a kitchen knife make the perfect serial killer costume?
8. Do you think twice when you don’t dress up and no one asks you a question at a Halloween party?  What do they think you are?
9. If you scream out in the middle of the woods, does anyone in China hear you?
10. Why do most of the people in horror movies walk into that dark basement without any type of weapon?